Hiatus

February 3, 2012, 6:56 pm

I realize I've been away for awhile. Rest assured that i have not been idle on the creation front....

Some production has had to stop briefly while I waited for finances to come in line to order more supplies -- now that thats taken care of i need to consider what tooling i need to pick up next.

I have made a bit of headway on patterning, as i need to adjust the posture collar a bit, among other things. I also need to improve my skills with Illustrator or a like product for fast and easy pattern modification.

On the kink play side of things, i have now learned to cath myself, which means i can cath others (very evil grin). Rocket and I haven't managed to line up on tuesday as frequently as we would like, due to being busy, and bits of flu going around, but I expect we'll get back to it :)

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Back at It

May 9, 2012, 7:15 pm

≫ Next: On the Soapbox

≪ Previous: Hiatus

After a fully eventful weekend, I figured I may as well write something up about the goings on of late. First off, to the people that were reading the blog, I apologize for the long absence -- I've been concentrating my efforts elsewhere for the most part.

That said -- here are the juicy details of the weekend.

I had been talking to divepup for a little while about making a visit and getting to meet, and it finally panned out and he was able to come down. He arrived on Saturday morning around 11am, so before we got down to business, we went out and got some lunch (For you Chicagoans out there, I took him to Portillos -- a staple of Chicago fast food).

Upon returning to the house, I gave him the grand tour, ending with the playroom, and after we chilled for awhile, decided it was time to gear up and get the show on the road. I won't go into excruciating detail about what we did, so here are the cliff notes:

On saturday evening I had him get in his nice tight latex catsuit. I then put him in the leather sleepsack and rubber puffy hood, strapped tightly to the table, and gave him his first electro experience. In my experience most people don't take very well to electro, but he didnt seem to have any issue -- at least judging by the sounds and body language. After he got some 'relief' that way, I left him for quite a bit that way, and then finally locked his catsuit on and let him up so we could grab some dinner.

After dinner I could tell he was still being the insatiable pup I would expect (and still locked in rubber, I should add). He was eager to try the strap table, so i put him on it in his catsuit and helmet and put the robojac to work on him. Those of you who have a robojac know that sometimes it works on a guy, and sometimes it doesn't. In this case, it definitley worked and in no time at all, it had done it's evil work. Seeing as the robojac hadn't noticed that he had gotten off, I left it to work on him for awhile yet (he made plenty of cute/hot noises at this point). Eventually I let him up again, by then it was time to wind down a bit and head to bed.

Note: He was still locked in his catsuit from about 2:00PM at this point.

Sunday I woke up early (most who know me, know that i rarely sleep very much). He was up along with me, and I could tell that he was sporting some morning excitement through his suit. So, off to the playroom I went to fetch a whole lot of restraints and straps. He soon found himself in a nice tight spread-eagle (again in his helmet), for yet more electro torture. After a good bit of tormenting I allowed him to get off again (#3 but who is counting, right?).

By then it was getting to be around lunchtime so i decided I should had to finally release him from his catsuit (as he had nothing to cover it with when we went to get some lunch -- a problem which will be rectified next time). I unlocked his suit, and sent him to get cleaned up so we could get some food and he could air out a bit.

He had been in his catsuit continuously for 22 hours at this point -- his previous record having been 6 hours. I'd say he shattered that quite nicely -- we'll go for 36 at IML I think.

After lunch we went to perv out at the Dainese store in Schaumburg for a bit, and then came back home.

His last experience for the evening was two-fold. The first was a suspension in a leather mr-s suspension harness, in wetsuit, MX boots, helmet, gloves. I kept him this way for about an hour or so, but sadly as the case usually is, he started to get a little numb from the harness. After that I put him back on the strap table very tightly for another session with the robojac. After another hour of torment he managed to get off for the 4th and final time of the weekend.

Since I had already kept him about 3 hours later than I should have, we said some hasty goodbyes, and sent him on his way (several hours of driving away). Hopefully he'll come back for another visit sometime, though admittedly I'll have to find some new rides to give him if he does....

-rf

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On the Soapbox

May 10, 2012, 7:23 pm

≫ Next: Gearblast!

≪ Previous: Back at It

Ok -- this is likely to piss some people off (some people I would count as friends, or close acquaintences), but I'm going to climb up on the soapbox for a moment.

I have a regular number of blogs that I read with a varying regularity -- daily, weekly, monthly. Over the past several years I have noticed more and more that blogs that started out as a smattering of thoughts and experiences behind the person eventually became twisted and changed -- changed in a way I disagree with.

It seems when a blog gets popular or starts getting a lot of hits, the first thing that happens is that the porn and gear manufacturers jump all over it, and there is obviously some (however small, likely) kick-back for the blogger posting their content. Think about it -- you've seen this -- the blogs have been invaded by Bound Gods, Serious Male Bondage, Mr S Leather to name a few.

Now, I dont have a problem with this from the standpoint of the vendors, my beef lies with the people behind the blogs. Whenever I feel like i don't have enough content, i just remind myself that I would rather continue to draw on my own experiences and thoughts to create my blog posts. For me (and this is a preference), to simply regurgitate porn unto my blog is a waste of my time, and of the readers time.

While from time to time, I may post some images or video from porn productions that I think are particularly appealing, that is by not by any means going to make up the 'Meat and Potatoes' of this blog.

I apologize to the friends I may have offended, including the great guys at Serious Male Bondage, who showed me a great time when i was last in the SF Bay Area. This is just a matter of preference and not a personal vendetta, so please don't take it that way.

I am just tired of great blogs being diluted by cookie-cutter-content.

Thanks for listening
-rf

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Gearblast!

May 11, 2012, 7:12 pm

≫ Next: Coming Full Circle

≪ Previous: On the Soapbox

For those of you coming to visit Chicago for IML, the Gearblast party is a party you shouldn't miss. This will be 5 years for the Gearblast party at IML, and it's gone a few places as well -- check out http://www.gearblast.com

Hope to see you there, and thanks to scubaccs / @rocket_pup for putting all of this together!

-rf

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Coming Full Circle

June 11, 2012, 7:47 pm

≫ Next: Safe Project Update

≪ Previous: Gearblast!

Recently I've decided to revisit a project I more or less put away about 3 years ago....

Those of you who know me will recognize from the pics what this is. For the rest of you here is some background:

In 2009 I was working a job that was beginning to go nowhere in terms of monetary compensation, and therefore i both had little motivation to do the work, and much motivation to find some other way to make money.

During this period I started working on a chastity/timelock safe project. I took an off-the-shelf battery operated safe, and gutted it. I installed an LCD, salvaged the solenoid and keypad from it, and got out my handy micro controller development kit. Over the next 4 months I made SIGNIFICANT headway on this project, to the point that I was nearly ready to prototype boards for it and assemble the first models for my beta group. Without going into too much detail, suffice it to say this safe would do significantly more than just lock using a code you choose.

In December of 2009, just as I was getting ready to wrap up this project, out of the blue I got a job offer from a very reputable technology company, and based on my employment situation, I accepted it. Needless to say the learning curve of this new job, combined with longer hours than i had previously worked combined to partially (but not totally) derail this project.

For the next 4 months, I diligently put time into debugging code and hardware and nailing down the details of this project. Then in April of 2010, a very good friend whom I have blogged about before, Bodisama, passed away.

Needless to say, since I started this project, and was working on it with his continued encouragement, my drive to continue in this endeavor dropped to practically nil.

For the next 3 years, the project, which was 95 percent ready to go, sat under a desk in the office at my house and collected dust.

Some good friends recently have prompted me (purposefully or inadvertently) to pick back up where I left off with some of these technology projects. Today I am working on this project again with a renewed energy and hope to show some results in the next 2 weeks. My goal is an alpha model prototype in 2 weeks or bust.

So to those folks who have gently or not so gently prodded me back into action on these things, I just wanted to say thanks individually:

bikermtl - Thank you for gently prodding me to get your safe done before we all die of old age.
scubaccs/rocket - Thank you for being a catalyst for my creativity and a perverse outlet.
johnnygear - Thank you for being another to gently prod me, and answer my dumb software questions.
rbrpissboy - Thank you for answering my hardware and software questions, and helping me fix issues that are making me want to smash things.

Also, and possibly most of all, thanks to all of the above, and every one else for your ideas, and for being there to bounce ideas off of when the need arises.

Here are some photos of the safe and some hardware as it sits:

-rf

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Safe Project Update

July 14, 2012, 7:42 am

≫ Next: Collared by Rocket!

≪ Previous: Coming Full Circle

So I know I promised updates on the Safe Project, so here they are (albeit a bit delayed).

The first test safe is now completed, and the components are mounted and housed in their respective places inside the safe. There have been a few changes -- Namely the LCD is now a Serial instead of Parallel type, to save wires, and the mounting of the LCD has changed (at least for the initial unit)

I am busily running the safe and software through its paces to find bugs (and I have found a few, especially unexpected buffer overruns, etc).

The next steps are to construct 3 beta model safes and distribute them to a select few people whom I will choose for the task of playing with the safe, and identifying and reporting bugs.

I am also working on a PCB for this, if anyone has PCB layout experience, get in contact with me, as i have not done this since college.

Version 2.0 of the Software is already underway using some different logic -- for you computer nerds out there, the 1.0 version was well-functionalized, but not well thought out in the logic department, as it was sort of a haphazard effort as I implemented features.

Version 2.0 will include scrolling menus, increased setup options, and more linear flow of operations using a statemachine model of software.

Here are a few photos of the safe in action:

Thats it for now, stay tuned for more updates to this project.

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Collared by Rocket!

October 11, 2012, 6:40 pm

≫ Next: What Does a Collar Mean to Me?

≪ Previous: Safe Project Update

It has been a long time since i blogged, but I have to share my most recent life change.

This Tuesday, I was collared by Rocket, with the blessing of his partner (Reddywhp for those interested). For those wondering, there is no 'term' defined, and I will be in collar as well as in chastity when he desires.

Personally I hope that it doesn't end at all, i can't think of any reason i would ever want it to.

Here is some background of how this came to be:

As a lot of you know, since Rocket moved to Chicago, we have played regularly on Tuesday, and hung out quite a bit outside of that. We seem to be very much kindred spirits in a lot of regards, and have formed a meaningful connection in and out of the scene. It is difficult to put into words, but I care for him deeply.

A few weeks ago, we discussed my going into chastity for him. After a short discussion we decided that when we met again, I would go into chastity with no definite release period, and he would get the keys.

On Tuesday, after being put into Chastity and relaxing for a couple minutes he posed the question:

"How do you feel about being collared by me?" He asked.

I will admit, my response to it was less than graceful -- I think i stammered something out, I actually can't even remember what it was.

I was floored, it may sound like I am overstating, but my heart leapt -- I had butterflies. Those of you that know me, know that I tend to NOT be emotional about things, but this was amazing :)

Needless to say, I accepted and I'm extremely excited and very happy. I am lucky to be collared by him, and when i feel the collar, it still gives me butterflies.

-rf

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What Does a Collar Mean to Me?

October 11, 2012, 7:04 pm

≫ Next: The Posey Straitjacket Self Bondage Mistake

≪ Previous: Collared by Rocket!

The first thing that comes to mind when posed the question is Trust, simply put.

When one considers it, trust (in this particular regard, especially) is very much a two-way street. By wearing a collar for Rocket, it shows that i trust him, and trust him to make decisions for me, both in and out of play. Conversely by putting his collar on me, it shows that he trusts me to be obedient, honest and open. I will admit, this is a poor way to put words to it, but I am doing the best I can.

A collar also signifies ownership -- not ownership as in 'property', specifically (though that is certainly one of the meanings involved). I am speaking of ownership as an emotional and physical bond between the wearer and the owner - something that transcends verbalization.

In my opinion, a collar is an achievement, a milestone -- the BDSM/Fetish equivalent of an engagement or wedding ring. This is more than simply a fashion accessory, it is trust, ownership, a sense of belonging, and of safety.

When we met, were either of us 'driving' toward a collar relationship? In a word -- no.

Something that makes this even more meaningful for me, is the fact that Rocket identifies as mostly sub/passive. What this means to me is that, although he identifies as mostly submissive, he feels strongly enough about wanting me to belong to him, that he is willing to pursue a relationship in this way. It is a big decision :)

A very special thanks is also due to Reddywhp, who is Rocket's long time partner, and without his blessing, this arrangement would not have been possible. He is a great guy, an experienced player and a huge computer nerd ;) I look forward to spending more time with him as well.

Have no worries, I fully intend on topping Rocket frequently…. after all, it IS my job to make him happy.

Stay tuned for more blogs -- one of my rules of ownership is that I must blog twice a week, and I plan to obey.

-rf

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The Posey Straitjacket Self Bondage Mistake

October 15, 2012, 9:31 am

≫ Next: My Roots in Kink

≪ Previous: What Does a Collar Mean to Me?

While I was visiting San Francisco last year, I was talking with Mikey (bndgkid) and the folks over at SeriousMaleBondage about self bondage adventures. Mike had recorded a video about being caught in self bondage by his dad, and it rekindled some memories, one of which I thought i would share here.

When I was in college, I spent a lot of time on ebay looking at (cheap) bondage gear. One of the purchases that I made, that i still have, is a Posey Straitjacket.

As most of the bondage folks know, a straitjacket isnt too much fun by yourself, as you have no one to put you in it. Creativity won the day, and I figured out a way to both put myself into it, and get myself out of it again, even using the side and front loops -- needless to say i was very proud of myself.

Without describing the entirety, we'll just say that it involved a rubber band around the friction buckle, and a closet door (the bifold kind). Pull the jacket over your head, get your arms/straps thru the loops, and the strap end through the buckle. Insert in the 'pinch' point of the closet door, push the door closed, and use it to pull the strap tight. Voila! SJ self bondage.

In 2004 we moved to a new apartment, which did not have bi-fold doors on the closets, but regular doors. This didn't seem to be a problem, as i could just use the pinch point to one side of the door.

In one particular case, I was doing just that, and pulled a bit more vigorously than usual, and *CLICK* the door shut with the strap in it. As you can imagine, i was in a straitjacket, tethered to the door, unable to move away, with no arms/hands to pull the door open.

I was very convinced i would have to wait for my roommate to get home to let me out, in what would be a very embarrassing explanation. However, i was able to get enough slack to get around and manage to use my elbow to open the door (this, after nearly an hour of struggling to get free).

Needless to say it was quite the adventure (and I will admit i was raging hard most of the time :-D ), and although i managed to get myself free, I never did do the posey self bondage in that fashion again at that apartment.

The Moral of the Story: If you HAVE to practice self bondage, make sure you have an out, think it through, and make sure you have an emergency plan (in my case, my roommate).

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My Roots in Kink

October 21, 2012, 2:54 pm

≫ Next: Openness

≪ Previous: The Posey Straitjacket Self Bondage Mistake

For a long time now I have sort of introspected myself to figure out how I've come to the place that I am now. It's been a pretty interesting journey and it makes me think back to my roots a bit -- where all of the feelings associated with fetish and kink began. This is my story as well as i can remember it....

I first started getting the kink stirrings at an extremely early age -- in fact I was tying myself up with ropes, chains, belts -- really anything I could get my hands on before I could even manage an erection -- My best recollection puts it at somewhere around 9 years old or so. I can recall a LOT of bathroom self bondage from about 9 - 17 years old.

As a result of a childhood surgery and some subsequent medication I had a pretty rough and very early puberty -- At about 10 years old, I went from four foot something tall to around five and a half feet tall. As a result it was pretty painful, I had the TERRIBLE mid-pubescent voice, and of course the sexual stirrings began. It was at this point bondage/gear and sexual feelings began to be intertwined.

Somewhere in my tenth year, I had my first orgasm. Like many bondage lovers and fetishists, I did not have it purposefully so to speak. I had my first orgasm tied up on my bedroom floor, in self bondage with bicycle inner tubes ( apparently I was at least a little inventive even then ). As a young male that had never experienced this before, I was terrified -- I had NO idea what just happened, all I knew what that I LIKED it, and bondage was how I arrived there.

For about the next four or five years, I didn't have an orgasm without bondage. It wasn't until I was about fifteen years old that I actually 'jerked off' in the traditional sense. At sixteen I had a girlfriend (Yes a FEMALE), who liked to tie up boys, and I bought some of my first 'real' bondage gear.

At either 16 or 17 I bought my first latex (like one young @divepup) -- and I didn't cheap out, I had a latex catsuit as my first piece of purpose-built fetish attire. I was hooked, and continue to be to this day -- clearly.

At seventeen I met my first gay male partner for a play date -- he lived 100 miles away, and it was quite a drive. I was shaking and having second thoughts when i pulled up at his house. All i knew was I wasn't going to back down and I didn't -- a little chit-chat and some pizza, and we did the deed (This should be it's own blog entry).

From the sum of these experiences and experimentation, and a lot of great friends and experiences since, I learned my sexuality and my fetishes.

Is it expensive, complicated and time consuming? Yes -- definitely!

Would I trade it for anything? NEVER, vanilla sex is boring :)

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Openness

October 22, 2012, 3:00 pm

≫ Next: Magazine Cover

≪ Previous: My Roots in Kink

I recently took a play-cation to visit a friend I have been talking to for a very long time. One of the things that struck me prior to the visit was how he seemed to be digging for information about my likes and fantasies harder than anyone ever has before. Me being me, I started to wonder why.

After a lot of thought on the matter, I realized some things:

1) Knowledge is power - The more you know about each other, the better time you will have.

2) Be Honest - If you'd like to try something, and are a bit nervous about it, or have concerns, voice them.

3) Dark fantasies do not have to be reality -- but they can be rooted in it.

4) Mind fucks can be more powerful than sensations - knowing someone well makes this possible.

There are a lot of questionnaires going around right now for BDSM to help you get in touch with your perspective playmate better. In my opinion this does not replace good old-fashioned chatting and getting to know each other. Additionally, sharing some photos, videos and stories that you enjoy the most can tell someone quite a bit about what you like.

In the end I was more open than I had been with anyone previously about some of my really deep dark desires. The result of this was an amazing visit, with great play, and i got to cross several things off of my bucket list.

-rf

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Magazine Cover

October 27, 2012, 3:04 pm

≫ Next: 24 Hours in the Gimpsuit

≪ Previous: Openness

Somehow I've managed to get on the cover of boi magazine regarding Mr. International Rubber. Quite a surprise -- They must like the mohawk hood too :)

Kinda flattering. LOL

-rf

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24 Hours in the Gimpsuit

October 29, 2012, 8:07 pm

≫ Next: My Border Crossing

≪ Previous: Magazine Cover

For years now, I have had long term bondage and encasement of various sorts on my bucket-list. One of the top things was doing 24 hours in the gimpsuit. There had been a few attempts that didn't go to completion for various reasons, so until 10-29-2012 this had gone unfulfilled.

Apparently after whining to Rocket enough times that i didn't spend enough time in the gimpsuit, he decided NOW would be the time that I would do my 24 hours. In this particular matter, if I wanted to be obedient, this was not going to be optional -- this required some preparation on my part.

To prepare for my imprisonment, I was told nothing but liquids starting Sunday at noon. This might sound easy, but from start to finish, I had nothing solid, and ate nothing but slimfast. I fast learned to hate the taste of chocolate slimfast drinks -- It didn't take long, after number 3 or so I dreaded them :)

Upon arrival at Rocket's on Monday, I was told that I should clean out, install my electro butt plug, and get in the gimpsuit. We made short work of that, and within 30 minutes or so, i found myself chained to Rocket's bed, with electro in my ass, very immobile. He then told me I was going to drain a fully charged Erostek 312 box with my butt plug (I thought he was kidding). After draining the entire battery he switched it out for another electro unit.

Here is a photo of how I found myself:

After spending about 7 hours like this, he let me up and transferred me to the couch so I could relax. Eventually, he put restraints on my wrists and clipped them together until it was bedtime.

Upon entering the bedroom, i found the bed made up with a rubber sheet, a rubber pillow, and a rubber cover for me to lay under.

It looked amazing!

For sleep, I had wrist restraints and ankle restraints locked close together, with a short chain from my wrists to my ankles and then to the bed. Rocket was nice and let me take my sleeping meds to help me sleep, as i am an insomniac and rarely sleep more than a few hours a night without help.

Regardless of pharmaceutical help, I still only managed to sleep from about midnight to 5am or so, probably due to excitement, anticipation -- I will admit, comfort was never a issue.

Some time after I woke up, I had THE 'moment'. My brain decided that I had enough, and I wanted the fuck out - after thrashing around a bit, and having a little moment of panic, I settled down. Those that know me, know that this is NOT a moment that I will experience very often -- something about it brought it out, and it was amazing.

A large factor contributing to this is one very simple thing -- if i called out to Rocket to come let me out of bondage and the suit (which was not likely), it was pretty much guaranteed that not only would i NOT get out, but he would add bondage, and just generally make my situation more intense.

With that idea dominating my thoughts, I let out a deep sigh, and from there on I was totally in subspace -- I wasn't totally immobile, I wasn't gagged, there was no electro or anything causing me distress, but i was trapped, and had no easy out.

Around 9:30 or so, Rocket came in to see me after he had awoken. He laid with me for awhile, and then tied me spread-eagled to the bed and slowly worked my cock, while I stewed in the final hour of my imprisonment.

Eventually he allowed me to cum for the first time in two weeks -- as a reward for making it the full 24 hours without any issues. After my orgasm, he told me I had another 30 minutes before release.

I was spent, stewing in my own sweat, and still bound tight to the bed.

Rocket suddenly says "I want you to piss."
"On the bed?" I responded
"Yes, on the bed." He says.

I pissed all over myself, and onto the rubber covered bed as Rocket slowly brought himself to orgasm over my bound form. It was an amazing ending to an amazing 24 hours.

Not only had I successfully completed my 24 hours in the gimpsuit, but I had done it with a plug in for the entire duration. I broke 2 barriers with this experience -- Longest time with a butt plug, and longest time in full coverage.

All in all, it was one of the more memorable experiences I've had. The only thing that worries me is his words shortly after i was released -- "I guess 48 hours is next."

There were a few unexpected side effects of this imprisonment:

1) I have a HUGE affinity with the gimpsuit (more so than before)
2) That was the BEST lunch I've ever had.
3) That was the BEST shower I've ever had :)
4) I HATE slimfast, but it's worth it (can one have a slimfast fetish)

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My Border Crossing

November 5, 2012, 6:41 pm

≫ Next: Rocket in the Gimpsuit

≪ Previous: 24 Hours in the Gimpsuit

A few months ago, I visited Montreal for a vacation and stayed with Bikermtl for a week. Since i wanted to bring as much gear as possible, and flying was significantly more expensive, I decided that i would drive there rather than fly.

Those that have travelled with me, know that in this regard, I am a bit of a walking statistic. If it is possible to get stopped, i will get stopped.

During the border crossing into Canada, i got the usual questions, and after answering them, surprise surprise, I got sent off to the inspection area. Keep in mind that i was carrying several cases worth of fetish gear for the ride.

I was politely asked to open my car up and unlock all of the doors. After a rather thorough inspection I was asked about a few random items. Here are a few of the more amusing tidbits:

What are these for (Regarding sportbike leathers)? Riding motorcycles, and sex.
What is all of this? Gear for bondage and fetish.
Where did you meet your friend? A latex fetish website.

After asking all of the questions and getting proper answers, they sent me on my way. Not before I noticed the female inspector thumbing through some pretty explicit photos on my ipad, with a HORRIFIED look on her face. Nothing was said though.

Things i took away from this:

Be Honest, lies wont help anything (hence my honesty)
Be Prepared, they might ask anything
Be Organized - in case they DO want to look

I will blog more about the actual experiences in Montreal as time goes on :)

-rf

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Rocket in the Gimpsuit

November 5, 2012, 6:58 pm

≫ Next: Safewords

≪ Previous: My Border Crossing

In the time i have had the gimpsuit, i have had a lot of folks ask if they could try it. Most of those people get a pretty straight 'no', or i avoid the question altogether. The suit is special to me, and I feel weird letting other people try it.

So far i have let one other person try the suit, and you can probably guess - that person is Rocket.

Earlier this year, I decided that since we have a kinship in regards to rubber and gear, I would like to share this experience with him, and so let him try the suit out for one of our Tuesdays.

While he was in the gimpsuit I got in the latex drysuit and my mohawk hood to top him. Chicagogear was nice enough to take a few photos of us that i think are rather nice, so I thought i would share some here:

For me the gimpsuit really changes my mindset, sometimes i almost feel like a different person in it -- and after trying it and having a bit of a scene and some time to relax in it, Rocket feels the same way about it.

It's interesting how a full coverage garment can be transformative, and sometimes change the way you act.

I would imagine someone like myself could be 'conditioned' with that sort of treatment.

-rf

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Safewords

November 13, 2012, 8:32 am

≫ Next: Leveraging Stories

≪ Previous: Rocket in the Gimpsuit

This particular topic is a bit of a 'hot button' for a lot of guys, sparking arguments, raising tempers, and just generally causing friction between people sometimes. The perfect topic for someone like myself that tends to like to get a reaction.

What are my thoughts on safewords? I don't play with safewords. I don't play with them sometimes based on the person I'm playing with -- I just flat out don't use them.

Here is why:

A lot of the play I like to do, involves an extreme level of trust between myself and the top, or the bottom and myself. If the play is going to be intense, then we already need to have a deep seated trust of a similar intensity. This kind of trust can take a lot of time to really form.

In my mind, if i can utter a word, or hear a word uttered, and it brings the whole scene to a screeching halt, then the control is an illusion. I would rather play with people i have well established trust with, that can read my sounds and body language and interpret my fantasies/fetishes well.

Does this mean I will get in over my head some day? Likely -- it's a risk of playing this way, and one I'm willing to take.

ps - I have nothing against folks that want to play with safewords, it just isn't how I conduct myself.

-rf

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Leveraging Stories

November 15, 2012, 6:18 am

≫ Next: Chastity and my PA

≪ Previous: Safewords

No, I am probably not going to write stories for this blog (unless they are true). I just happen to lack that particular creative spark to write something that others (or myself) will find stimulating. I have tried it before, and have utterly failed -- there are quite a few things I'm good at, this is not one of them.

That said, I did want to talk about stories -- in particular, a request I make when meeting someone for the first time.

Before I play with someone for the first time, I have made it a common practice to ask them to send me a few stories that they particularly enjoy, or use when they are getting off. Stories can tell you a lot about what gets a persons mind racing -- what gets them hard, and what they might want.

It can be a slippery slope, as a lot of stories contain things that aren't actually feasible to do to someone, unsafe, or things that are more intense than that person is prepared to handle.

Used properly, however, you can leverage these to get 'inside' someones head - both to get them in the headspace and to mind-fuck them.

After all, what would you be thinking if you were suddenly the sub in your favorite story?

Short post, but some food for thought....

ps. Videos and Photos can work just as well, if you find someone who doesn't like reading his porn ;)

-rf

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Chastity and my PA

November 20, 2012, 9:27 am

≫ Next: Thanksgiving

≪ Previous: Leveraging Stories

I originally got a prince albert piercing for chastity purposes in 2004. At the time, and still, lots of folks thought i was crazy, that being my primary motivation for getting a body piercing.

Admittedly, it hasn't been used as much recently for chastity, but that is about to change.

Rocket has me gauging up to 2ga on my PA, as the chastity device i ordered from steelworxx.de has a 2ga PA lock built into it. I tried this stretch once before, and failed as i seem to have aggravated the PA and had to take jewelry out of it for a few weeks so it could calm down.

At this point, I suspect it will be some time around the New Year before i make the 2ga mark, as I am at the 6ga point now. Thats a hard couple of stretches with some tapers to arrive at that point, and I'll have to make sure to give plenty of time for the piercing to relax between.

In case i haven't posted it before, here is the device:

-rf

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Thanksgiving

November 22, 2012, 12:58 pm

≫ Next: Cath Play

≪ Previous: Chastity and my PA

While everyone else is posting on twitter and facebook what they are thankful for, I'll just do it here.

Today I'm thankful to my friends I've made during my journey, and the connections i have made through my more atypical interests.

I'm thankful for being able to be who I am, and having friends that accept me as such.

For living in a world where gays can be out and be proud in an increasing amount of places, without fear.

For having a great family, and people who care about me.

Last, and importantly for my Owner, awesome friend Rocket -- Any time I am feeling down, I can put my hands on my collar feel better.

A little sanity in relative insanity :)

-rf

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Cath Play

November 25, 2012, 12:16 pm

≫ Next: It's Not Bondage Until You Want Out

≪ Previous: Thanksgiving

Something that seems to get a lot of attention is catheter play.

Cath play is something that can be extremely fun and stimulating, but has to be done the right way.

In a fetish/play sense, I learned to cath as a top from Rocket, who was the first one to do it to me.

He made a very good point about learning to cath someone:

If you want to learn to cath someone else, you should first learn to cath yourself -- learn to do the whole procedure to yourself at least once. Go over it in your head, ahead of time. Learn the process and feel the sensations that you are going to cause someone. Keep in mind that everyone feels urethral play a little bit different.

This isn't something you should learn on your own -- you should have someone teach you that knows how to do it, and has experience.

The Fun Parts (To name a few):